I feel I have to blame somebody for the sadness and frustration I feel today and I was thinking it is so much easier to blame George Bush than anyone else...We got the long awaited email from our case manager that we have an embassy Date- but its not what we had been thinking and planning for- we thought we would be leaving next wed for an Embassy date on the 23rd of May. But the email went something like this: "Congratulations you have an embassy date of May 30th!" It looked like the type of email that would cause all sorts of celebrating and joy...but I just plummeted into sadness- for many reasons- one being its one more week before I get to be with my two boys- I just can't wait to see these guys- hold them- kiss them- watch them sleep- play with them- feed them- care for them- bring them home to meet their sisters and brother...etc etc. I also knew that plane tickets would be hard to come by. I was busy all day and so it wasn't until the very end when I got the email from our travel agent who wrote to say she could get us on a Lufthansa flight for a ton of money and we would have to get German tourist visas for the kids...and that...point blank...there were no other flights- no wait listing- no flights. Nothing. At this point- I knew the next step was to ask for a new embassy date of one week later...yes...LATER....I can't even begin to describe the kind of tailspin this sent me into- because it means so many things as far as the plans for childcare- I now not only need to see if someone can watch my kids while we are gone and they are out of school- before they would have been in school all day- but I need to find someone to watch them the first week of summer when I would still be working. And work???? I am so ready to be gone from work its not even funny. I planned it all around being GONE BY NEXT WEEK. (Sorry Chipees who may be reading this...its not you...its work) Anyway...I am still in limbo...tomorrow - I call and ask to move my embassy date and get new tickets and hopefully save money.
What’s one more week? Well its a lot when you are just a baby and a little boy - now granted - they don't know that they aren't with me- which is good- its just me who knows and feels their loss at this point (and Phoebe who asked every day when they will be home- today she said, will they be home for my birthday? Which is this weekend- so "No, Phoebe they will be home a month after your birthday!" Bummer. I think that sadness I feel is somewhat accumulative...this whole process is just so incredibly stressful and it does tend to build up quite a bit. And when I am sad I miss my family a lot. They are all very far away- and there are no plans for any Colorado visits in the near future. But I have some wonderful friends- and I am glad they are here. (I have to say that in case you are reading and think I have forgotten how wonderful you all are!)
Why blame Bush? War equals rising gas prices and rising gas prices translates into less airplanes flying and higher prices…which means I don't get to smooch my babies for another month.
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Hang in there Em they'll be here before you know it and this will all be well worth the wait.
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