Tuesday, December 27, 2005

First post

Its late and I have just finished reading all of the latest posts on the Ethiopia adopt group. I vacillate between being excited and terrified and lately I have been more terrifed than excited....but slowly this image of this child is emerging from somewhere-its still very out of focus but its there...and as this child's face emerges...I find myself becoming more excited...more longing...more wanting this to happen...

And then more annoyed with some of the posts on the Ethiopian adopt yahoo group. On one hand its kind of "reality show entertaining" to read people's posts who go on and on (passionately I might add) about topics that just don't belong on that forum...but on the other hand I find myself skipping ahead to read about the woman who is anxiously awaiting her daughter's arrival...the one whose husband went to pick her up. She would write for weeks leading up to it, about how he was going and how she had to stay behind with thier other child...what should he pack...how much money should he bring..then he left and she would post about how they were communicating...and how she couldn't wait to see her daughter and hold her and then the days became hours and she was posting "They will be home in 3 and 1/2 hours.." Then finally...a simple and peaceful post- that was so different from some of the earlier more frantic and questioning posts..."she came home an hour ago and is sleeping calmly in her bed...its like she was always here." That about did me in. To watch that process over the past few months. And it made me think that we will be there...and that is a good thing.