Thursday, January 12, 2006

The Process

So, I told Mark I have this Blog---where I have Blogged only once..he said, "you have a BLOG?" he thought that was funny. I am really inspired by this website I saw of a family who just got their referral of a 4 month old little boy- they are using our same agency and are at the same point in the process that we are. Their website is really fun. So I am going to try and be a better blogger (try and say that 5 times fast!).

The process for Mark and I probably really started before we were ever married. It is something we have always talked about- and of course after traveling to Romania and visiting the orphanage in Arad- I think I was sold - Mark was in the middle of Law school at that time and wasn't really even ready to talk about something that huge.Then we started talking about more children again and through a series of events ended up deciding to pursue an adoption from Ethiopia back in October. By my birthday, November 7th, I had interviewed the major agencies (there are 6 official agencies that help people adopt from Ethiopia) that I was interested in.

We started our homestudy in November. Our first meeting was in a starbucks of all places...our house isn't huge and the kids were home and it would have been difficult to talk there. The second meeting was in the library by our old house- the kids were there - but off reading a goofing around. Our third meeting was in a different library (are you seeing a trend?) and this is the one where she had to interview Mark and I separately. We envisioned some of the questions she might ask...of which she asked few to none of the ones we thought she would - she was easy on us. My favorite part is that she asked me "What is it about Mark that REALLY annoys you- that drives you crazy? what one thing????" I thought and anything that truly annoys me is so not worth mentioning (like I used to hate it when he left the shower curtain a certain way- in our new house we have a shower door- so problem solved!) So I said, "What's to annoy? He does so much for all of us that is hard to say." But my mind was then thinking- "Ohnowhatdidhesayaboutme!?!" (because I know that I am annoying...) So I asked him as soon as we got in the car...it was a very sunny day - typical of Denver, Colorado - so I moved my visor to the side so the sun wouldn't shine on me and he replied, "I said that I really hate it when you move your visor to the side." I said, "you mean like I just did?" He said, "yes- I had to say something- and that really annoys me."

Our final Homestudy visit was Saturday- this is the one where she comes to the house and interviews the kids. So we cleaned. And basically resigned ourselves to the fact that our house is what it is...half painted with three kids and a dog and a guinea pig---all of whom are messy and all of whom don't do a lot of cleaning up after themselves...the funniest part of this meeting was that Phoebe (6) was really nervous. She said, "What if she makes us do something we don't know how to do?" I said, "Like what?" she replied sadly, "Like jump rope.." Mark said something like, "Yes we will all have to demonstrate our fine jump roping skills to the Ethiopian Government". The reality is - it feels like that, with this Dossier, the paperwork is overwhelming and everything costs money and you need 50 copies of everything notarized and authenticated and kissed by the Pope.

I want to wrap up this post- but I wanted to say we did have our 2nd orientation call with our agency (CWA) on Tuesday in which we were warned that we could receive our referral at anytime. I know it won't happen until at least February because our case manager is in Ethiopia from now until the end of January...but February is soon enough...and it could be later. We are excited and waiting patiently for things like Mark's passport and approval from Immigration- both of which can take some time. But the homestudy visits are behind us.....until we bring our child home and do the post placement visits!

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