Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Daddy Bye bye Woof woof...


This was how I explained to our boy where his Daddy was this morning when he woke up. They have been so bonded since day one and at first - while in ethiopia- I kept dreading getting home and Mark heading to work- what would this little boy who has lived either in this man's arms or on his shoulders for the past two weeks do? But he met the challenge and it was good because he had to come to me for his water, to take him to the potty, for food, to get shoes on...that was all good and important- lest we end up as the chapter in some psychologist's book on attachment disorders in internationally adopted children one day. He also started coming to me for the hugs and the snugling- that was VERY good. But then we came home to NY to see family and he had his Daddy every day again for a week- and now he is gone. He woke up today. "Daddy?" I said, "Daddy bye bye." I said, "He went on a plane...on an airplane...bye bye...but he will be back." (he gets planes, he gets Bye Bye..." He responded, "Maren plane bye bye?" Very hard to explain that we will go back in 10 days and see him and that he still loves him but has to work. How do you say we will go back home? We keep calling this place "Home" and then there is Ethiopia- this kid still talks about our trip to Sodo and Awassa and Shashamene...He still talks about the kids at the care center. This kid is supposed to be about 3 1/2 and many times seems like a solid 4 year old- he understands a lot of what we say and can say so much in two other languages- but this concept of Daddy leaving is broken down to "daddy Bye bye plane" and so I thought about what he knows in Colorado and that is our dog Max. We love how he says "Max"..."Mackes." He makes it two syllables- he does this to names sometimes - it makes them sound much more Ethiopian. So I told him Daddy had to go and be with Max- the dog. He can picture that. So all day its "Daddy, bye bye, Plane Woof woof." At one point Mark called- Maren got on the phone and well... if looks could kill...he was really mad and would listen to Mark intently but would not talk back. He was not happy. But without Daddy this kid swam by himself today and went to sleep without someone laying next to him for an hour...so in some ways he shows a little more independence without his Daddy...but check back with me in 2 or 3 days and see if I have lost my mind. Me doing 5 kids solo is what is really probably worrying this kid- like I said he is a smart guy and knows that I need that Daddy guy as much as him!

5 comments:

God's Beautiful Chaos said...

Thank you for everything. I can't wait to someday meet your children and you all! You have been a light to me through all of this. You are in my prayers! Love, Sandra

PastormacsAnn said...

Praying for you doing the "solo" mommy thing. Those can be some really long days.

Thank you for the window into your life. It's priceless.

ANN

Renee said...

Wow! He sounds like he is doing great! I will pray for you.. it's so hard when Daddy is gone!

Your sons are beautiful!!! Is that an Ergo your dh has on?

Thanks for sharing!
Blessings,
Renee

Thankfulmom said...

Em, We just got back from a trip where I told so many people about you and your family and how you have influenced our lives, leading us on this amazing journey.
Enjoy your time with your family - how precious to share your new little ones with them.
Lisa

Anonymous said...

There is a book called "Bad Dog Max." It's a really cute book that actually tells the story of a good dog that is misunderstood. I love reading your stories, musings, and looking at the fantastic pics...